When people think about eating disorders, they often focus on food, weight, body shape or exercise.

However, for many people experiencing an eating disorder, these behaviours can serve a much broader psychological function.

One of the most important functions can be control.

An eating disorder may provide a person with a sense of certainty, structure, predictability or control at a time when other areas of life feel overwhelming, uncertain or difficult to manage. This does not mean that a person consciously chooses to develop an eating disorder. Rather, eating disorder behaviours can become a way of responding to difficult emotions, experiences or circumstances, and over time, those behaviours can become increasingly rigid and difficult to change.

Understanding the function of control can therefore be an important part of understanding eating disorders and supporting recovery.

What does control have to do with eating disorders?

Eating disorders are complex mental health conditions. They are not simply about food or wanting to change the way someone looks. For some people, controlling food, eating, exercise or their body can create a temporary sense of order.

A person may experience thoughts such as:

• “At least I can control what I eat.”
• “I don’t know what’s going to happen, but I know what I’m doing tomorrow.”
• “If I follow the rules, I feel safer.”
• “Everything else feels chaotic, but food is something I can control.”
• “When I stick to my plan, I feel like I’m doing something right.”

Initially, these behaviours may provide a sense of achievement, certainty or emotional relief.

However, what begins as an attempt to create control can gradually become something that controls the person.

Eating disorders are not simply about wanting to be thin

One of the most persistent misconceptions about eating disorders is that they are primarily about wanting to lose weight. Weight and shape concerns can certainly be important features of some eating disorders. However, eating disorders can serve multiple psychological functions.

These can include:

• Seeking control
• Managing anxiety
• Coping with difficult emotions
• Creating predictability
• Managing uncertainty
• Seeking a sense of achievement
• Avoiding uncomfortable experiences
• Regulating self-esteem
• Creating a sense of identity
• Feeling successful or “good enough”
• Coping with interpersonal difficulties
• Responding to experiences of trauma or stress

The function can also change over time.

What initially provides a sense of control may eventually become driven by fear, habit, anxiety and the eating disorder itself.

Why can control feel so important?

Most people want some degree of control over their lives. Having a sense of control can contribute to psychological wellbeing. However, life inevitably involves uncertainty.

People experience changes in relationships, work, study, family circumstances, health, finances, identity and future plans. For some individuals, particularly during periods of significant stress or uncertainty, controlling food and exercise can provide a predictable set of rules.

For example:

“I can’t control what happens at work, but I can control what I eat.”

“I can’t control how other people respond to me, but I can control my exercise.”

“I don’t know what the future holds, but I know exactly what I’m allowed to eat today.”

The problem is that this sense of control can become increasingly narrow.

From control to rigidity

An important distinction is between healthy structure and rigid control. Healthy structure might involve planning meals, participating in regular physical activity or maintaining routines while still allowing flexibility. Rigid control can look very different.

A person may develop rules about:

• What foods they can eat
• When they can eat
• How much they can eat
• How food must be prepared
• How much exercise they must complete
• What their body should look like
• What their weight “should” be
• What foods are considered “good” or “bad”
• What they must do to compensate for eating

Breaking these rules can produce intense anxiety, guilt or distress. The behaviour is no longer simply providing structure. It has become a requirement.

Control and perfectionism

For some people, control within an eating disorder is closely connected to perfectionism.

A person may develop extremely high standards around food, exercise, body shape or performance.

They may believe:

• “I need to do this perfectly.”
• “If I make one mistake, I’ve failed.”
• “I should be more disciplined.”
• “I need to be better than I was yesterday.”
• “I shouldn’t be struggling with this.”

This can create a cycle where achievement provides temporary reassurance, but the standard continually moves. The person never feels that they have done enough.

Control in athletes and exercisers

Control can also have a particular role in eating disorders among athletes and people who exercise regularly. Sport naturally involves structure, discipline and goal setting.

Athletes may legitimately monitor:

• Training load
• Nutrition
• Recovery
• Performance
• Body composition
• Sleep
• Competition preparation

These behaviours are not inherently problematic.

However, difficulties can arise when performance behaviours become rigid, anxiety-driven or increasingly focused on controlling weight and body shape.

For example, an athlete may begin by modifying their nutrition to support performance. Over time, this may become increasingly restrictive. Exercise may also shift from something enjoyable and performance-focused to something that feels compulsory. An athlete may begin to feel unable to rest, eat flexibly or respond to their body’s changing needs. This distinction is particularly important when considering eating disorders and disordered eating in athletes.

Why recovery can feel like losing control

One of the most important considerations in eating disorder treatment is that recovery may initially feel uncomfortable. If restriction, exercise, weighing, body checking or food rules have provided a sense of safety, reducing these behaviours can create uncertainty.

Someone may think:

“If I stop controlling my food, what will happen?”

“What if my body changes?”

“What if I gain weight?”

“What if I lose control completely?”

These fears deserve to be taken seriously. The goal of treatment is not to replace eating disorder control with another rigid set of rules. Instead, treatment can involve developing the capacity to tolerate uncertainty, respond to emotions and make flexible decisions without relying on eating disorder behaviours.

Developing flexible control

Recovery does not mean having no control over your life. Instead, it can involve developing flexible control. This means being able to make choices while also adapting when circumstances change.

For example:

• Eating when your body needs nourishment
• Adjusting plans when circumstances change
• Resting when you need recovery
• Participating in social activities without rigid food rules
• Responding to emotions without needing to control food
• Allowing your body to change naturally
• Making decisions based on values rather than fear

The goal is not perfection. It is flexibility.

When should you seek help?

If food, exercise, weight or body image concerns are increasingly determining what you can and cannot do, it may be time to seek professional support.

Signs that additional support may be helpful include:

• Increasingly rigid food rules
• Fear of eating certain foods
• Compulsive or excessive exercise
• Frequent weighing or body checking
• Significant anxiety around eating
• Avoiding social situations involving food
• Feeling guilty after eating
• Preoccupation with weight or body shape
• Difficulty taking rest days
• Feeling distressed when routines change
• Feeling that food or exercise is controlling your life

Eating disorders can affect people of all genders, ages, body sizes and backgrounds. You do not need to be underweight or visibly unwell to deserve support.

Eating disorder support in Perth and Fremantle

Understanding the function of control in eating disorders can help explain why changing eating disorder behaviours can be so challenging. For some people, the eating disorder may initially provide structure, certainty or a sense of control. Over time, however, these behaviours can become increasingly restrictive and begin to control the person’s life. Psychological treatment can help explore what the eating disorder is doing for you, what needs it is attempting to meet, and how those needs can be addressed in healthier and more flexible ways.

At OM Psychology, psychological support is available for people experiencing eating disorders, disordered eating and body image concerns in Fremantle and Perth.